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Journey is the fourth episode of the third season of Netflix's Heartstopper, and the twentieth episode of the series overall.[1]

Synopsis[]

Charlie seeks medical help and begins the long road to recovery. Nick starts keeping a journal, and Tao makes a video to support his absent friend.

Plot[]

Two months later, Nick is on the phone with Tara after taking Nellie out for a walk and the two talk about Charlie and how he probably wants to get home and unpack. But nevertheless Tara tells Nick she is excited to see Charlie again after he was away for so long. Afterwards, Nick finally listens to Tara and begins to journal. His December 17 entry talks about how back in September, Charlie had a GP appointment. Nick recounts how his boyfriend’s doctor visit must have gone okay since Charlie was referred to an eating disorder service. Unfortunately, the first appointment for that was not until January of the following year. As a result, things got really bad, as his eating disorder worsened. Charlie ends up snapping at not only Nick, but at Tao and Isaac during lunch who are just trying to be there for him. Nick further mentions how eventually Charlie stopped talking to him about his eating disorder, and this led to Charlie skipping school a lot. Nick compares it to a spinning wheel that was just getting faster, to the point that it was becoming unbearable for him. Eventually, when he would calm down a bit, Charlie confided in Nick about how he would self-harm, and admitted to feeling horrible for the way he was treating him and everyone else.

On his better days, Charlie would be smiling as he played Mario Kart with Tori and Nick, and even was able to hang out with his friends, and be there for Darcy when she decided to cut their hair. Nick further journals how in October, Charlie had a particularly bad time, which with Nick’s help, Charlie decided to enroll in a clinic program that would hopefully help him with his eating disorder. Nick admits that he found it weird to be at school without Charlie. In addition, Nick couldn’t talk to him to ask how he was doing since he was not allowed his phone while being a patient at that aforementioned clinic. Nick also goes on to say how Charlie allowed him to talk about what was going on with him to the rest of the friend group. He didn’t want them visiting, but everyone found different ways to show their support. So they all begin to gather stuff they could send to him in a care package like some Blue-Rays, self-care face masks and board games. When Halloween arrives, Nick ends up going to Sahar’s party dressed as Captain America, which disappoints Imogen since she wanted him to dress up as Ken, so that the two of them would go as Barbie and Ken. At the party, Nick keeps to himself mostly, drinks some beer and at one point witnesses Sahar and Imogen making out. Things take a turn when Sahar walks away and the rest of the friend group watch in bewilderment. Later, Nick consoles Imogen who is throwing up as she voices her frustration with the way Sahar is behaving towards her. She mentions how everyone is allowed to experiment, and it’s not wrong to make out with people at parties. While the rest of his friends have fun, Nick finds himself unable to do anything else besides drinking and sitting on the couch at the party. After a while, he finds a quiet spot at Sahar’s house and sits down. He is joined by Tao not long after, who wordlessly pulls him into a hug as Nick finally allows himself to cry.

Nick further journals how at the start of November, Charlie phoned from the clinic for the first time. Nick jokingly tells Charlie how the following year, he will make Charlie dress up as Spider-Man. Charlie jokes that Nick’s Marvel agenda won’t work on him. To which Nick asks if that will still be the case if he goes as Mary Jane so they can do the upside down kiss. Which has Charlie saying on the other side of the phone, that maybe he can be persuaded. Eventually, things get serious when Charlie confesses that he was diagnosed with anorexia and OCD. He tells Nick how the OCD diagnosis surprised him, but in thinking back, it also makes sense because he has all kinds of rules in his head about food. Trying to lighten the mood, Nick chastises Charlie for breaking their promise and using the word “Sorry”. Charlie jokes that he thought he’d be able to pull the mental health card to get out of it, but Nick does not budge and tries to joke that the word sorry remains banned for both of them. Later, Nick mentions how after Charlie’s first phone call, he was able to visit him with Charlie’s family a couple of times a week after that. Although, he writes in his journal that he is still unsure if Tori even likes him.

From Charlie’s point of view, during his arrival at the clinic, he is told that for his safety,he is not allowed to have anything with a camera. So he sadly gives Susan, one of the employees at the clinic, his cell phone. Susan informs him that if he ever wants to talk to his friends, he can use the landline at the clinic. Eventually, he has his first appointment with Geoff, who becomes his therapist while he stays at the clinic. He admits that for a while he thought food was something he could control, but as it turned out, it was the other way around. Geoff explains to him how for some people, an eating disorder is about body image, losing weight and calorie counting. But in Charlie’s case, it is connected to obsessions and compulsions. Such as eating the right thing at the right time, and in the right circumstances. But when those obsessions become particularly intense, Geoff assesses that this seems to trigger the urge from Charlie to self-harm.

During one of the family visits, Tori tells Charlie how Nick seems to miss Charlie. She even admits to her younger brother how Nick is his favorite, and she likes him, but that the rest of his friends are quite annoying.

Later, Charlie and Tao talk, and his best friend apologizes for not being there for him. Charlie smiles, and says it is okay because Tao was having his big, summer of love. However, Tao tells Charlie that he loves him too, and is just a bit frustrated that he missed the signs. Charlie reminds Tao that he was good at hiding it, so he shouldn’t be too hard on himself. Some time later, Charlie mentions how being at the clinic has not magically cured him of his mental illness, but it got him out of the deep end. Geoff tells him that even though it can be daunting, he feels like Charlie is ready to leave the clinic. However, he reminds his patient that they can carry their sessions once a week for as long as he needs.

Cast[]

Starring[]

Guest-Starring[]

Co-Starring[]

  • Lucy Speed as Susan Denvers
  • Riz Khan as GP

Quotes[]

To be added.

Trivia[]

  • In this episode, when Tao (William Gao) gets the gang to film messages for Charlie during his treatment, Isaac mentions he finished Madeline Miller's The Song of Achilles on Charlie's recommendation: "I know you said it was going to have a sad ending, but I wasn't prepared and I cried for about four hours".[2]
    • Other books Isaac is seen reading this episode include: Starfish by Akemi by Dawn Bowman and Emma by Jane Austen.[3]
  • Imogen is dressed up as Barbie from the 2023 live action film starring Margot Robbie. While Nick is dressed as Captain America, Tao as Frank from the film Donnie Darko, Sahar as a genderbent version of Dracula and Isaac is dressed as a Mr. Darcy type. Darcy and Tara for their part are dressed as Shrek and Fiona.
  • Darcy states they are trying out they/them pronouns in their part of the video Tao is making for Charlie while he is at the clinic.
  • When Nick tells Charlie that for the following Halloween, he will make him dress up as Spider-Man, it is paying homage to the webtoon, where Alice Oseman drew Charlie in a Spider-Man Costume and himself as Captain America.
  • Ironically, Kit Connor has several MCU connections as of this season since:
    • Olivia Colman, who portrays Nick’s mother Sarah Nelson, appeared as Sonya Falsworth in Secret Invasion.
    • Hayley Atwell, who portrays his Aunt Diane, was Agent Carter in the Agent Carter series and the Captain America films.
    • In 2024, his co-star Locke went on to portray Billy Maximoff/Wiccan in Agatha All Along.[4]

Music[5][]

  • The Band Camino “I Spend Too Much Time in My Room”
  • Tom Odell “Black Friday”
  • Billie Eilish “Blue”
  • The Hunna “I Wanna Know”
  • The Reytons “Wide Eye and Halos”
  • Chase & Status, Hedex, ArrDee “Liquor & Cigarettes”
  • Siouxxie Sixxsta “Darkwave Sabbat”
  • Fred Again & Baby Keem “leavemealone (Nia Archives Remix)”
  • Pendulum “Witchcraft”
  • Mallrat “Wish on an Eyelash”
  • Angie McMahon “Serotonin”

Gallery[]

Promotional images[]

References[]

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